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Sunday, July 15, 2007

Millions in Brooklyn and Outer Boroughs to Starve Wednesday

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The city girded itself for mass panic as the news leaked out over the weekend that FreshDirect will close next Wednesday to allow the company’s 1,800 employees to go to a company picnic.

According to Crain's NY Business, the shut-down is meant to be a celebration of FreshDirest's fifth year of business. But the revelation shook Brownstone Brooklyn to its core.

"OMG!" was the typical shocked reaction.

A correspondent from Brooklyn's delivery-excluded 11216 zip code laughed diabolically, shouting, "NOW you see how it feels! Hahahaha!"

6 comments:

  1. be good to have a night off. the fresh direct lorries block our street, belch fumes and make a racket while they idle. Oh and then you get all those idiot drivers that think bashing their horn is actually going to speed the whole fresh direct process up.

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  2. Pollution will probably go down 30% in Brooklyn Heights alone...

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  3. thank goodness. at least we won't have to hear the trucks idling while they don't make a delivery one day!

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  4. You people have no consideration for us overstressed upper-income hipster strivers with unused Bosch ovens. If FreshDirect is so bad, why did our expensive co-op in Dumbo put a FreshDirect freezer in the mail room. Huh?

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  5. When is Fresh Direct going to deliver to Downtown Brooklyn. I'm starving over here

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  6. OMG! They don't deliver to Downtown Brooklyn?

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