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Monday, January 3, 2011

The Most Useless Stories of 2010

It's time for McBrooklyn's annual roundup of the inane high lowlights of the year just past. How could you forget these great moment of 2010?

Here they are:

January: - A small New York subculture returns to the habits of their Paleolithic ancestors, call themselves cavemen. NY Times

February: Videos of UFOs over Brooklyn are posted on YouTube. The folks at The Disclosure Project issue several demands: that President Obama investigate the matter, gain proper control over these operations, and end for once and forever the secrecy surrounding the UFO subject. McBrooklyn

March: Nets fan wears paper bag over his head to protest the team's dismal season, provoking negative reaction from Nets CEO. Later, they make up. HuffPost

April: Genius physicist Stephen Hawking warns that if aliens visit Earth, we're in deep trouble. NY Magazine

May: The Observer discovers Brooklyn Bourgeois Bohemians -- BroBos! "Young, comfortable and inclined toward creativity, they enjoy a utopian-seeming existence marked by strolls down tree-lined streets, carefully chosen foods and leisurely weekends spent in coffee bars and parks." Jezebel

June: Smoking and drinking babies come out of the woodwork. Village Voice

July: Wearing dark sunglasses, rapper Foxy Brown waved to her fans as she rode up Schermerhorn Street in her black Lamborghini, on her way to Brooklyn Criminal Court -- this time for mooning her neighbor.  Brooklyn Eagle

August: Man locks himself in the bathroom for five days to get a few things done. Mark's Blog

September: Assistant DA in Brooklyn submits her resignation after her sudden celebrity on Donald Trump's "The Apprentice" starts getting in the way of her real job. McBrooklyn

October: Whole families take naps under the covers in beds at the packed Beijing IKEA. NY Mazazine

November: Man in a panda costume gets punched and kicked in Brooklyn. On purpose. Village Voice

December: Drinking cocktails and dressing up while watching the season finale of a period specific television show becomes all the rage. CarrollGardensPatch

What wonders will the new year bring? Adventures await us!


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